Monday, July 24, 2006

bitesize bullets



TEN TOPICS…
NO PARTICULAR ORDER…
ONE MAN’S OPINIONS…
FIFTY WORD LIMIT ON EACH…
I WONDER DOES ANYONE CHECK MY FIFTY WORD LIMIT…



WEIGHT : So far so good with my plan to reach my goal weight for the wedding- where X is what I weighed last week, I’m currently at X minus four pounds. Still a lot of jogging and pumping iron and dodging delectable dishes left to do!

BUSHBASHING: I was a bit alarmed to hear that there is a possibility that Florida governor Jeb Bush may run for President in 2008. I think twelve years of Bush rule is enough for everyone, don’t you? Jeb was in Dublin recently for a lecture and got a frosty welcome.

JACKS… : …is my Irish Slang World O’ The Week and is a word used mainly in Dublin which refers to the men’s room. While I’m on the letter “J” I will also explain “jar” which means a pint of alcohol. “He’s been in the jacks all day after too many jars”

FLICK: I finally got to see The Da Vinci Code, and I suppose I have to say that Ron Howard made as good a stab as anyone at putting it together. The only drawback, I found, is that there’s no way you could follow it had you not read the book.

STAG : Americans call it a “bachelor party”. This side of a pond it’s a stag party, which over the years has become elongated to a stag weekend. Mine is going to be in Westport in County Mayo in mid August, and there will probably be 11 of us altogether going.

TUNES: In my book the only “I used to be a pretty boy pop singer now please take me seriously” album that every actually worked, George Michael’s “Listen Without Prejudice Vol I” now occupies my car stereo.

ATTENDANCE : The RSVPs are coming in thick and fast for the wedding, and we were delighted to learn that my father, whom I met for the first time only in 2003, will be flying over from Oregon with his wife for the day. My mother, unfortunately, won’t be coming.

JOKE:
Top 3 Reasons Eminem's Wife Filed for Divorce

Sure, he talks and raps like a black man, but when he takes down his pants...

…Would rather end up like Nicole Kidman than Nicole SIMPSON…

...And The Top Reason. . .

Overheard 5-year-old daughter shouting, "Faggots!" while watching Ernie & Bert.




LYRICAL :
“Let me tell you now
Everybody’s talking about
Revolution, evolution,
Masturbation, flagellation,
Regulations, integrations,
Meditations, United Nations,
Congratulations.”

Who sang that? Check comments for the answer.

GOOGLING : Latest phrases to lead people here include …

“spider poop image”

“the general starring brendan gleeson”

“the away game socceroos lucas neill brokeback mountain”

“irish shag”

“pampering the rogue country pakistan”

“getting rubber bit guards on”

“scarleh wedding dress”

I hope they all found what they were looking for.



“Google phrases of the week” courtesy of StatCounter.com

“Irish Slang Word O’ The Week” courtesy of “The book of feckin’ Irish Slang that’s great craic for cute hoors and bowsies”

3 comments:

JL Pagano said...

In late 1969 when I was busy being a six-month old baby debating whether to poop or scream demanding dinner, John Lennon was recording this song in the midst of his famous "love-in" when he and his entourage stayed in bed singing "Give Peace A Chance".

Curly K said...

Well done on the weightloss, keep going. I sincerely hope you aren't right about another bleedin Bush heading for the White House - jaysus the world needs that like an atomic bomb! George Michael rocks musically although looks like he's in the middle of personal crisis at the minute. Brilliant that your Dad will make the wedding.

Paul O'Mahony (Cork) said...

I had a feeling your wedding would be coming soon. In case I don't wish you well again, due to my distractions, I hope you all have the most marvellous days. I imagine it'll go on over a few days.